Title: My Eyes and Ears... My Partner

Author: spookycc

Rating: Possibly PG, nothing more than the ep.

Classification: Fill-in-the-blanks for "Medusa", Scully POV.
                                DF -- *Doggett Friendly*

Summary: Scully's take on "Medusa". Sort of a companion piece to "Tunnel
Vision", but each work stands on its own.

Spoilers: Um, yes. :) For "Medusa". To be safe, for S8 so far.

Disclaimer: No characters, human or canine, are mine. <g>
And no dogs were harmed in the making of this fanfic. :)

Feedback welcomed at spookycc@earthlink.net

Dedication: As ever, to Doggett's Bitch (f/k/a "Vixen" :). My soulmate,
always. Thanks for lending your insights into Scully. She doesn't talk to me
as easily as "Jawn" does. <g>

And for girlassassin, you know why. Give da man a hug fer me and tell him
congrats again. 

No beta-reader was used. All typos are my own.

****

Transit Operations Center
Boston, Massachusetts

Deputy Chief Karras introduces us to the assessment team that will be
descending into the tunnel. I listen only peripherally, my mind pre-
occupied, but when I realize that one of the people is a doctor, from the
CDC no less, my decision is made. I can't go down there. I can't risk my
child.

Agent Doggett asks if I need help. God, yes, I do need help, but not with
the kevlar. How do I tell him I'm not going along?

In the end, I do just that. I'm not sure he buys my explanation of being
more useful up here. I understand he feels like a tag-along, but I assert
that the people with him are capable, and I need eyes and ears down there.

He pauses for a moment, mulls it over, eyes downcast. I almost wish he'd
just ask me what the hell is up, but he apparently appreciates whatever he
feels are my real reasons. He nods. "OK," he agrees. "I'll be your eyes and
ears."

I hand him the eyes and ears unit, and a feeling of deja-vu pervades my
thoughts. I let Mulder go in to the hospital after Modell alone, too, and I
almost lost him. But at least then I had *wanted* to go along, had *tried*
to go along. Mulder knew Modell wanted a faceoff with him, and him alone.

This is different. Or perhaps not. This man is also willing to risk whatever
dangers he may encounter alone.

****

When I ask if he can still hear me, Agent Doggett's voice rings clearly in
my headset. "Like a songbird". He hasn't heard me sing lately. I can't
carry a tune in a bucket.

His words are barely interrupted by shouts from Melnick, the tunnel's
engineer. I see through Doggett's eyes as he rushes back to where the rest
are gathered around Melnic. I see the wound in the shining of Agent
Doggett's flashlight on the back of the engineer's neck.

I have to agree with my partner, that it seems to me like we're looking for
a toxic leak, not a man, down there. Though the CDC robotic units didn't
register anything.

Dr. Lyle pulls a sample of water from a puddle they had just passed, and
sends me the analysis. It's seawater. What a surprise. I get on the phone to
see if I can get a molecular analysis, and hear Karras' annoying voice
behind me. "Four hours, Agent Scully."

Karras certainly is consistent, if nothing else.

Looking back onscreen, I see that Agent Doggett and the rest have found a
fork in the tunnel below. As Karras tells me that valuable time will be lost
if they investigate the decommisioned tunnel, I see the view ahead of
Doggett as he enters it anyway.

"Agent Doggett," I try to head him off. Not second-guessing him, but it
looks like our main goal would be best accomplished by staying on the line
where the train lost power.

He doesn't answer.

"Agent Doggett," I push a little harder. Even though his flashlight shines a
beam ahead of him, I can't see much.

"Just takin' a look," my partner assures me.

I hear in the background the other voices in the tunnel. The transit cop,
Bianco, thinks they shouldn't waste time there. Another surprise. Agent
Doggett asks the engineer, Melnic, what he thinks. He seems to advocate
searching the old tunnel.

My view through Doggett's mini-camera pans about 180 degrees, as I hear him
ask Dr. Lyle what her thoughts are. I hear her yell at my partner to look
out, and then the picture jerks back to its original position. All I can
make out is a hideous face, in just a hint of flashlight beam. I hear the
breath knocked from my partner, and the camera pans up over the face as
Doggett is knocked onto his back. Then there is silence, which I break
almost immediately.

"Agent Doggett, what happened?" I ask. He's only been down there a half-hour
and I'm already nervous. Doggett's camera is focused on Melnic, who is
apparently leaning over my fallen partner. "Can you hear me?" I persist.

I hear the barest hint of a "Yeah", uttered almost incoherently. He sounds
like he experienced what I suspected from what little I saw on the monitor.
He had the wind knocked out of him. Then I hear my partner let out a little
puff of air, and the camera pans to the ceiling, as he rests his head on
the floor of the tunnel again.

Worry gnaws in my stomach, and I wish I didn't have this feeling that it's
going to get worse before it gets better.

I see Melnic reach down to help Agent Doggett up, but Doggett waves away the
proferred hand, asking that he give him a minute to catch his breath.
Doggett wonders aloud the same question I've been asking myself, once I was
sure he's ok. What hit him?

Dr. Lyle says it came at him like a phantom, or something. Well, I saw that
much from up here.

Within a few moments, Doggett has rolled over, and the picture he sends
isn't a pretty one. A man loosely resembling the assailant they seek lies on
the floor. I say "loosely" resembles because half his face is gone. When
Agent Doggett has Dr. Lyle transmit some photos up to me, I see his chest is
in the same horrible condition.

I'm still trying to ascertain what could have caused this man's injuries,
when Doggett's voice pulls my attention back. Looking on-screen, I see what
he's looking at. Three bodies. Wrapped in plastic, but loosely enough that
it looks like they may well have been affected by whatever caused the
assailant's death.

I hear Dr. Lyle's alarmed voice through Doggett's microphone. She's seen
someone outside, in the main tunnel. On-screen, I see there is no one there
when they re-enter the tunnel. Lt. Bianco takes this as a sign that it's
time to head back, but we can't let them come back up here - in case they're
infected with whatever killed these people.

My concern is for my partner, and for the people down there with him. They
may have been exposed to a virus, or a contagion, and if there is someone
else in the tunnels, they need to locate that person and isolate him...

Karras is monumentally pissed off. Claiming that the bodies were probably
"tunnel rats", which I assume means homeless people living below ground, he
says he'll clean it all up after rush hour.

Why can't he see the bigger picture?

How can we bring these people back up without proper quarantine? And they
need to find whomever else is in the tunnels, to keep the infection, if it
is one, from spreading.

Karras says I'm being irrational. Yeah, unlike his idea to just bring
everyone back up and start the trains rolling... We're shouting at each
other, when I hear my partner's voice in my headset.

"Yeah-" I answer too sharply. Pulling my anger back within me, I focus on
Doggett and his immediate concern. He asks what to do, though I suspect he
knows. They need to find whoever else is in the tunnels...

As they head back through the main tunnel, I pick up most of a conversation
between Agent Doggett and Lt. Bianco. They're talking about my work on the
X-Files.

I find it curious that Doggett tells Bianco that "I" work on the X-Files. He
never mentions the fact that *he* is assigned to the X-Files as well. I
wonder if he tries to hide the fact from people. If he really doesn't feel
that the work we do is worthwhile.

Bianco asks Doggett if he knows me. I hear Doggett's reply that he does, and
that we've worked together for a short time.

It's been eight months, almost nine, since Mulder disappeared. Seems like a
*long* time to me... It's odd that Doggett considers that a "short time".

My interest piqued, I listen more closely.

Bianco asks why I sent Doggett down there instead of going myself.

I wonder what Doggett will answer, but only for a moment. I can almost
feel him shrug his shoulders as I hear his reply. "It was the right call."

Silence for a few moments. Watching Doggett's camera view, I see he's
looking right at Bianco, who says nothing. My partner speaks again. "You got
a problem with that?"

Bianco lets him know he *does* have a problem with my giving orders from up
here while they're down there "looking for jack squat". He feels their work
is done, they should be headed out of the tunnels. I wish they could be.
There's almost nothing I'd rather do right now than order them the hell out
of there. I just can't. It wouldn't be safe, and it wouldn't be responsible,
despite the fact that Karras thinks it's irrational.

"It's a question of contagion," Doggett asserts.

"It's a question of who's in charge," retorts Bianco.

I hear my partner's breath a little more rapidly in my earpiece, and I pull
him back from the confrontation. "Agent Doggett."

I hear his muttered "Yeah."

"You alright down there?"

"Fine." He's ok. He can handle the macho attitude from this guy who's two
steps up from a mall cop.

I hear a shout through the headset - Melnic is on the floor, and as Doggett
rushes to him, I can see what looks like electricity pulsing on the skin of
Melnic's left arm. Doggett asks for my help. I advise them to rinse the arm
with fresh water, and that seems to ease Melnic's pain a little.

Dr. Lyle asks what it is.

I hear Doggett's worried reply. "I don't know, and I don't like it that
*you* don't know. Agent Scully, talk to me!"

I wish I could help. It may be beyond our worst fears. A biochemical weapon.

I pull up a grid of the subway system, and there's only one other place that
the man they seek could be hiding. Melnic can't be moved, so Dr. Lyle stays
with him while Doggett and Bianco head further into the tunnel.

****

I leave the headset - and my partner - behind, as I rush to meet the evac
unit that's quarantined Dr. Lyle and Mr. Melnic. She's fine, but Melnic is
getting worse. I wish I could offer her more hope than I can. No one knows
what we're dealing with.

As I turn to head back to the control room, my attention is caught by
several gurneys, being pushed by men in unmarked uniforms. What the hell -
I catch up to them and order them to stop. They comply, and Karras steps out
from the next corridor. Why am I not surprised that he's behind this? He's
trying to divert the bodies from the CDC. I have a sudden crystalization of
thoughts - he *knew* the bodies were down there!

I don't try to keep the threat from my voice. "If I find out you sent my
partner and those others down there, *knowing* about this-"

"You are way out of line here," he retorts.

I demand to see inspection reports for the tunnels, and that sets him back a
bit. He agrees to find me the files. I make sure that the bodies are loaded
into the CDC vans in the parking lot before I make my way back to the
control room.

Picking up the eyes and ears unit, I slip it back onto my ear, speaking as I
adjust it. "Agent Doggett. Agent Doggett, can you h-"

My eyes are pulled to the monitor that tracks Doggett's camera. It is
totally still, and the view is of the tunnel ceiling.

A sense of dread descends over me. "Agent Doggett?... Come *in*, Agent
Doggett..."

No response.

"Agent Doggett?... Come in, dammit!"

Still nothing. I throw the useless unit onto the desk. I *need* to help him.
The only thing that keeps me up here is the knowledge that entering the
tunnel would pose a grave risk to my unborn child. I am overcome with guilt,
that I let him go down there alone, without backup. I'm supposed to *watch*
his back. He has been there for me every time I counted on him. And once, in
New Mexico, when by rights he had been ditched by *his* partner, and I had
no right to count on his help, he was *still* there.

My worries are interrupted by a marine biologist from Boston University. I
watch as she boots up her laptop and brings up a photo of what she calls a
"Medusa". My eyes drift constantly back to the monitor linked to Doggett's
mini-camera. Still no movement.

The biologist seems rather intrigued by the creature, until I tell her it's
killing people, and I don't know how. I tell her as much as I know so far.

"Have you been in the tunnel?" she asks, innocently enough.

I swallow my feelings. "No, I have not." I point to the screen above her
head. "But my partner is down there. And I fear the worst."

That's putting it rather mildly. I feel responsible for sending him down
there without me in the first place.

She looks toward the monitor, and shoots a glance back at me. I'm sure she
probably knows nothing about the workings of the FBI. That partners separate
only when absolutely necessary. Still, her eyes seem to look through me...

I have to try to raise Doggett again. I can't just stand up here and do
nothing. I slip the earpiece back on. I don't have any real hope that he'll
answer - the fear is a knot in my stomach. But after a few moments of
repeating his name, I hear a sound. And another.

"Yeah. I'm here, I hear ya."

He sounds like he's in pain, but to hear his voice again - relief sweeps
through me, and I don't even really know how he *is* yet. But he's alive.
I hear him take a few harsh breaths as he sits up. I see the tunnel wall on
the monitor instead of the ceiling.

"God, you had me - I started fearing the worst," I hear my own voice in the
headset. I'm not sure that I wanted to say that much, but it's out there
now.

Doggett understands what I'm insinuating, and explains what happened. Or at
least he starts to - he says he got "blindsided", but then there's a pause,
and the camera pans left and right. "I don't see Lt. Bianco. He's infected
with somethin'. I saw it glowin' on his skin."

The relief flows out of me like air from a popped balloon. If Bianco was
infected...

"And what's your condition, Agent Doggett?" I try not to let too much
emotion creep into my voice.

No response is really needed, as he looks down at his own hands and arms,
and sees the same thing the camera shows me - the green, glowing organism.
"I assume it's not good." I feel my spirits fall once more, the worry
knotting in my stomach again.

I tell Doggett to sit tight and I'll send a quarantine unit down. It's the
reasonable, medically sound thing to do. Isolate him, get him the hell out
of there, before he gets any worse.

Doggett will have none of it. He knows Bianco will try to get out of the
tunnels. And he knows there's no one else down there to stop him, so he
takes it on himself. He does that a lot. It aggravates the hell out of me,
and at the same time I admire his sense of selflessness.

The marine biologist gets on the phone with the CDC, trying to figure out
what causes the reaction once the contagion is on the skin.

The next step isn't so easy. Convincing Karras to block the exits so Bianco
can't get out if Doggett doesn't make it - to him in time. We argue back and
forth yet *again*, and finally he admits he's got passengers waiting on the
platform already.

Shit. I better tell my partner.

"Agent Doggett, we've got a new wrinkle."

I hear - I almost *feel* - Doggett's deep sigh, almost as if he was right
here beside me. "Don't tell me." His voice is so tired, yet still he infuses
his remark with a bit of humour, and I almost smile, despite the
circumstances.

"We're running out of time. It's twenty to four." I speak softly.

"I'm movin' as fast as I can."

That is *so* Agent Doggett. He should be in a hospital right now, and he's
apologizing for not catching up with Bianco. It doesn't even occur to him to
sit the hell down and let someone take care of *him*...

I sigh. "Agent Doggett, you shouldn't be moving at all."

He insists that he's ok, that he'll make it, that he'll be in a hot shower
within a half hour.

We both know it doesn't look good. For him *or* Bianco.

I'm torn between duty and what I *want* to do, yet again. Something inside
me insists that I should bring Agent Doggett up, but the rational, medical
doctor part *knows* that what Doggett is doing is right.

I try to warn him that we don't know what triggers the organism. My guess
would be increased heart rate or body temperature, but he counters that
maybe by simply moving, he's staving off the inevitable.

I can't argue. We just don't *know* yet what the hell sets it off...

Doggett carries no flashlight now, so it's almost impossible to see what
he's seeing. But he comes across Bianco, down on the tunnel floor, in bad
shape. His skin is covered by the green organism...

I tell the biologist to get the CDC to go as far as to *guess* what sets the
organism off. We need to find out.

I hear Doggett's voice in my headset again. He's waiting for instructions.
He picks up the flashlight that lays next to the transit cop.

I tell him to get out of there, knowing fully well that he won't leave
Bianco behind. Even though I can send a hazmat team down to pick him up and
quarantine him. I'm afraid that more exposure to a fully reactive organism
could be fatal for my partner.

It's not a surprise to me that Doggett throws Bianco's arm around his
shoulder and virtually carries him onward through the tunnel. Having found
the only other known carrier of the contagion, Doggett risks further
infection by his contact with Bianco. Part of me curses his dedication,
while another part wonders about the nobility this man has displayed almost
since his assignment to the X-Files. He drags Bianco along the tunnel, until
he sees a shadow ahead.

Gun drawn, he chases the shadow. It's a boy. And he's not infected.

Something clicks in my head. What triggers the reaction. Sweat. The boy
wouldn't be as affected as an adult because his sweat glands aren't fully
developed. 

When I tell my partner this, I hear a sarcastic "Just my luck" from Doggett,
as he follows the boy. Again, a smile threatens to work its way into my
serious expression. It's like another day at the office for Doggett, and I'm
up here worried sick. He follows the boy through a very reactive, green-
walled room. It leads to an access tunnel where I can send a hazmat team to
meet them.

Doggett goes back for Bianco, and the two men and the boy make their way
into the main tunnel.

The flood of bright green in the tunnel is only half of Doggett's problem
now. Karras just started the damned trains running.

Through Doggett's camera lens, I see the headlights of the approaching
train. But he's not moving off the track.

"Agent Doggett, what are you doing?!"

No answer.

"Agent Doggett!?"

Still nothing.

"Get off the tracks, Agent Doggett! Get out of there!"

He's worried about the people on the train becoming infected. I've known
Agent Doggett long enough that this doesn't surprise me. I want to tell him
to forget them. He's done enough for the citizens of Boston for one day -
for one lifetime - but he's not finished yet.

He tells me he has a plan, and I hope to hell it's a good one. All I can see
through his camera are the lights of the train. I see it almost upon him -
and the picture goes out. Static fills the screen, and all I can hear is
what sounds like high-voltage electricity. Damn!

"Agent Doggett? *Talk* to me, Agent Doggett!"

No response.

"Agent Doggett? Are you there? Can you hear me?"

"Yeah. Yeah I'm here." His voice is raspy, weak, but at least *there*

"Thank God." 

Did I say that aloud? I didn't mean to voice my feelings that explicitly,
especially with the marine biologist nearby, but there it is. And I find
that it doesn't matter.

"Uh - I lost you on the visual."

He must be playing with the unit, because now I see his glance sweep up the
wall on the other side of the tracks.

I can almost feel him rising shakily to his feet, just by the wobble of the
camera. I wish I was down there to help him. I wish I'd been down there with
him this whole damned time. But there was more to think about...

He is silent for the longest time, and the picture is almost black, now that
the train's lights have receded. What the hell is going on down there? I
still see a normal view on the monitor - although it's so dark the
perspective is nearly lost on me.

Finally I can't stand the silence any longer. "Are you ok?" I ask.

"I can only hope, Agent Scully."

****

"Whoa, hang on a second!" I grab the shoulder of one of the EMT's who's
ready to load my partner into an ambulance. I was practically lost in the
maze of platforms, running to the dock they'd used when the CDC vans
arrived. I heave a huge sigh of relief, to be able to see him, finally. Not
looking *well*, really, but I've seen him looking worse.

"Agent Doggett?" I ask, more than a little worried that he might be in pain
- his eyes are clenched tightly shut. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, just swell," he responds.

I talk the medics into letting me ride along to the hospital, and I climb in
after they load the gurney. I'm a bit awkward in this damned hazmat suit.

I want to say so many things. I want to explain why I didn't go down in the
tunnels with him. I want to let him know how worried I was - how worried I
*am*. I just don't know how to start. I lay a hand on his arm. It feels hot
to the touch, even though I have gloves on. He looks at me worriedly, and I
reassure him. "You're gonna be fine. It looks like you're pretty much clear
of the contagion. We're just gonna take you in, clean you up and run some
tests, to make sure." Maybe I'm trying to convince myself, as well...

He turns his head a little, looking pointedly at my gloved hand. "Not takin'
any chances, though, huh?"

His remark hits me like a physical blow. All the guilt I've felt about
letting him go down there alone is right here, looking at me with a half-
swelled-shut left eye. I pull my hand away quickly, embarrassed and ashamed.

"Scully - I didn't mean-"

"No, it's ok. You've got every right to feel that way."

"*What* way? You made the right call. We needed you up there with that idiot
Karras. You figured out what caused the contagion to react. *You* got my ass
outta there."

I'm not convinced, and I try to shade the worry from my eyes. I'm sitting
wallowing in self-pity and guilt, when he lays a hand on top of mine.

I almost jump at the sudden contact, not out of fear but out of surprise. I
hold the impulse back. I don't want to push him away again. Ever again.

Part of my protective wall crumbles just a bit, and I need to explain to him
why today went down the way it did.

"When you were 'down', Agent Doggett,"

"Which time?" He smirks a bit.

"*Both* times. There was a part of me that wanted to pitch my headset in the
trash and come down after you. I think you deserve an explanation why I
didn't do that."

He shakes his head. "You don't owe me any explanation, Agent Scully. You did
what you felt you needed to do, and I did what I needed to do. There was no
point in exposing yourself to the organism when we already had a team in the
tunnel." 

I can't meet his gaze at first, but then I raise my eyes to do so. "There
are... *medical* reasons why it's more unsafe than it would normally be for
me to expose myself to anything hazardous."

"What is it, Agent Scully?"

I stumble for the right words, but before I can answer, his pain meds take
over, and his eyes drift shut.

I sit and watch over him, rather like I've been trying to do all day. This
man who without pause thinks of the other person first. I had absolutely no
right to send him down alone today.

If he'd died down there, I honestly don't know what I would have done. He
didn't have to go down, without a partner, but he trusted me, and it almost
got him killed. I was supposed to watch his back, and dammit, yes, I had a
good reason not to expose myself to the contagion. But that just doesn't
fly.

I remember a conversation with a woman in Pennsylvania, whom I called after
Doggett's "death", and subsequent rebirth in - under - her home. I was
attempting to make some sense of the case, and I'm not sure she helped in
that, but the man she spoke of - John Doggett - put his life on the line in
that situation, just as he did here, today. In that instance, it was for
some type of creature he was trying to help escape the townspeople.

This man who acts with the interests of others in mind, rather than his own,
almost lost his life today, because of me.

I hope the EMT doesn't notice the tears under the hazmat hood...

****

Boston General Hospital

I head to Agent Doggett's room, to give him the good news. He can go home.
As I enter the door, which is already open, I see my "patient" half-way to
the door from his bed. He stops short and actually teeters just a bit before
steadying himself and affecting a properly nonplussed look.

"Where do you think you're going?" I ask.

"To find the nurse. She said she was gonna talk to the doctor about me goin'
home. I could be dyin' in here, for all she knows."

"Well you're not, Agent Doggett," I reply. "Your skin and body have been rid
of the organism. A simple alcohol bath cleaned you right up."

"Well, can I get outta here?"

I can't help a little smile. This sounds strangely familiar...

"Yes," I reply.

He heads for the changing area, but at the last moment, he remembers about
the back of hospital gowns, and he sidles the rest of the way across the
room. I can barely stifle a smile as I avert my eyes.

Doggett asks about the others who were in the tunnel with him. I tell him
that the boy is with social services and that plastic surgeons are working
on Bianco and Melnic. Dr. Lyle has been discharged.

His voice is muffled as he slips a t-shirt over his head. "You know, I'd
like to think that this is over. But there's gonna be hell to pay for these
guys."

"No... it's *over*, Agent Doggett," I reply from outside the curtains.

He steps out, still zipping his pants. "Excuse me? This guy Karras put a
*train* back on the tracks. He recklessly endangered peoples' lives."

I hate to burst his bubble, but I do. "There is no proof of that."

"What do you mean, there's no proof?"

With a sigh, I explain that the organism is dead. There is no trace of
it anymore. It was destroyed, probably by the electrical charge he set off.

Doggett can't quite believe it. That nothing will happen. "We've got
victims. Dead bodies."

Since they were infected with a pathogen that still hasn't been identified,
I have to tell him that no criminal charges will stick.

"These guys were just doing their job. Keeping the trains running." I pause,
and lower my eyes. "But they've got you to thank. And not just for saving
their butts."

"No, you figured it out," he insists, "I was just your eyes and ears."

I can't hold back a slight smile.

"Agent Scully-" he starts.

I raise my head, and meet his eyes, just for a moment. I feel like maybe
it's time. Maybe I should just tell him everything.

I can't. I'm afraid...

Just that quickly, the moment passes. "Let's go home." My voice almost
breaks, a little.

I wish I could have told him. I'm ashamed that I can't, that I have to keep
this secret from him. It's not fair to him, I know. But I still have this
fear, one I can't push aside, that when my secret is out, they'll use it to
take me off the X-Files.

That would close the only door I have open to look for Mulder, and I can't
take that chance. But I can't go on hiding something this important from a
man who obviously cares for me. Perhaps an opportunity will present itself.

There's always tomorrow...


~fini~