Three Months By Michelle Kai Summary: The title refers to the time in between Mulder's burial and 'resurrection'. Just a glimpse into some of the characters. Mostly Doggett, I guess =) Rating: PG Classification: Scully/Doggett friendship. I guess since we don't know 1013's version of this, it is not officially AU Spoilers: DEADALIVE, small one for Never Again Disclaimer: they are ALL MINE! Feedback: This is my third fic, please give me some pointers! Distribution: Anywhere, I'd be honoured. Please let me know so I can visit. Author's Notes: I know it's a bit long bit please give it a try. (more at the end) <> January Raleigh, North Carolina "I know, and I don't truly believe that ... Mulder's the last." Dark figures dispersed, car doors closing gently and firmly, with a finality devastating to those unconsciously likening it to the closing of the coffin. Engines coughed to life and bore the heavy hearts away, with many a worried, backward glances at the two solitary figures remaining where the snow-trodden paths ventured out. And though the smaller figure leaned into the gentle embrace of the larger one, it is unclear who is seeking comfort from whom. The merciless wind howled, but they are oblivious to the cold, aware only of the chill in their hearts. Long minutes passed as John Doggett sat in the driver's seat of AD Skinner's car, staring at the mirrors, wanting to go retrieve the two, but afraid to intrude in their private moment of shared loss. Just as he reached for the door handle, the sound of icy snow being crunched underfoot made him turn around instead, to see the back door open. The frail frame of Agent Scully slipped into the car, numbed in body and spirit. Her door closed and the other back door opened momentarily, and shut again, enclosing AD Skinner. "Let's take Agent Scully home, Agent Doggett." Skinner said wearily. Doggett felt the professional walls up, shielding the hurt of personal loss. Doggett also recognized the AD's unspoken request to not say anything. Sympathy was not what Agent Scully would want. Even if he spoke then, Doggett wasn't sure whether he would be heard. Agent Scully is already lost in her own world, a faraway look in her darkened blue eyes. Exchanging a look with Skinner through the rear view mirror, Doggett released the brakes and drove off. For a second he left like a cab driver, uninvited in their grief of Mulder behind him. Then he realized that he'd be anything if it could only take some of Scully's pain away. Silently they pulled up to Scully's apartment. Skinner walked Scully to her door. "Dana..." "I'll be fine, sir. Go home." "If you need anything - " Skinner's voice caught. Scully lowered her eyes and nodded, unable to stop the hot tears springing to her eyes anew. Even through her tears she saw the pain on his contorted face. Reaching out she gave him a brief hug. Without another word, she turned and entered her apartment, closing the door and shutting out the world. ******************************************************* Doggett's Residence John Doggett buried his head in his hand. He couldn't figure out why he was so upset. Sure, the loss of a colleague is always a tragedy, but this ex-Marine, ex-NYPD, had seen a lot worse than this. He promised her he'd find Mulder, and he did. He didn't mean dead. He's failed her, like he failed Luke... "John." Doggett jumped out of his skin before he remembered Monica was staying with him while in town. "John, how are you doing?" Monica approached the couch where Doggett was seated. "I'm okay." his cracked voice indicating otherwise, "I mean, I didn't even know him personally..." "But you feel her loss." Monica finished for him. "John, you did everything you could. Against all odds, you found him. It might not be much now, but over time it will be closure for her. You did your best." "WELL MY BEST ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH!" Doggett exploded, standing abruptly. "It wasn't good enough for Luke, and it isn't good enough for her!" "John! It's not your fault! You didn't kill him." "But I promised her I'd find him, to bring him back to her! I gave her my word!" "John," she grasped his arms, "Look at me, John, look at me!" Monica shook him. "It's NOT your fault. It's not your fault!" Doggett felt the anger drain out of him, replaced by grief and pain. He felt like a rag doll in Monica's arms. "It's not your fault." she whispered and pulled him into a tight embrace. His long pent up tears flowed for the first time in many years. ****************************************************** February The mask of composure never left her face, John Doggett observed. Not once in his presence since she got back to work mere days after Mulder's burial. She went about her work with the same efficient, logical, thorough method as always. She attended meetings and went into the field with him. Handed in reports on time and never arrived late at work. At first AD Skinner was very worried about her and at his insistence she seek counselling within the Bureau. Everyone marvelled at how well she is coping and eventually they left her alone and went on with their own lives. Whispered rumours about Dana Scully rose and fell, and everything went back to normal. Doggett knew better. He's donned that mask before. ******************************************************* Valentine's Day Dana Scully arrived at her office and was shocked. A bouquet of yellow roses laid innocently on her desk. She can't remember when was the last time that she's gotten flowers NOT in the hospital, if ever. It must be a mistake, Scully thought, It must be someone else's, delivered here by accident. As she slowly picked up the flowers a petal fell, and she was briefly reminded of another rose petal that has graced this desk before. Swallowing to counter the lump in her throat, she carefully extracted the small card and read - Agent Scully - scrawled on it in a hand shhe readily recognized. Inside, it said simply, John Doggett. When she looked up she met with the hesitant eyes of owner of that name. Eyes that fear the Scully Wrath. "What's this for, Agent Doggett?" her voice without inflection. Clearly embarrassed, Doggett shifted his gaze before replying, "A lady shouldn't be without flowers on Valentine's Day." Maybe it wasn't such a good idea. Doggett left like a high school kid, standing there. He had meant it as a simple gesture. Just taking advantage of another over-commercialized day to extend his friendship, hoping for a chance through her impenetrable armour. Well, maybe not just a friendly gesture, but he knows that he'd be insane to hope for anything more. "Thank you, Agent Doggett." she said evenly, and then - Doggett thought he could jump for joy - a smile graced her beautiful face. He sported a goof grin of his own, and seemed unable to wipe it off. "Well, uh, the Skinner wanted to see us." he said to break the silence. "Okay, let's go." Later that day Raleigh, North Carolina "Mulder, it's me" she said as she gently lay flowers by his headstone. "Happy Valentine's Day" In the weeks have followed his death, Scully has visited this place almost daily. At first, she would break down completely, sobbing uncontrollably and screamed at the winter skies. Gradually it became quiet tears. Then one day she realized that she's all cried out, and spoke to Mulder instead. As cases came in and she had to head into the field, she came less often. But she feels him near, anywhere she is. She can almost hear his witty comments or see the intensity he would have pursuing a case. Scully slid her hand onto her ever- expanding belly. "I had another check-up yesterday, the doctors said that the baby is doing fine. Skinner is starting to talk about my maternity leave, but I want to work as long as possible. Don't worry, I feel fine, and I'm doing more autopsies and paperwork than actual investigating now anyway. Agent Doggett - " she smiled at the memory, "Agent Doggett gave me flowers today..." then shook her head sadly. In a distance, a figure stooped to place flowers down. "Happy Valentine's Day, honey" Doggett gently whispered. Lightly he brushed some soft snow off her headstone as he'd brushed hair off her face so many years ago. "And how are you doing, Luke? Sorry I haven't been here lately, daddy's been busy with work." With a finger he traced the letters of his son's name. L... U.... He feels the familiar tightness in his throat. Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes and tried to bring up his favourite memory of Luke. "Agent Doggett." a familiar voice called from behind him. Spinning around, he was surprised to see Agent Scully there, with a look of concern and understanding on her face. She's read the inscription he was tracing. What is she doing here? "I'm sorry, I was over there and I just thought..." Scully was at a lost for words because of her discovery. "I ... I didn't mean to intrude." Realization dawned on Doggett's face - she was here to visit Mulder, of course. And she's just found out a part of my past. Instead of feeling resentment, Doggett was surprised that he was relieved. He wanted her to know. "It's okay, Agent Scully." They stood there for a long moment in silence, neither knowing what to say. "Tell me about Luke." Where do I even start? Doggett thought. The wind picked up slightly and the snow began in earnest now. "How about over dinner?" Doggett asked. "Sure." Wonders never ceased - Scully smiled for the second time in one day! Doggett extended his hand and Scully accepted it. Together, finding strength in each other, but walked forward from their past. **************************************************** March "Is everything fine with your dinner? Can I get you anything else?" maitre d' asked helpfully, looking first at the lady and then the gentleman. "Yes, everything is fine, thanks." John Doggett replied, hardly taking his eyes off the beautiful face of Dana Scully, illuminated by candle light. The maitre d' slipped discreetly away, after sharing a conspiratorial look with Doggett. It was not lost on Scully. "John, what was that?" Scully said with mock sternness. "What was what, Dana?" Doggett asked with feigned innocence. "That *look*, with the maitre d'. You know exactly what I'm taking about." " Uh... no, I have no idea." "John! What is -" as the voices of several waiters singing approached her table with a candle-lit slice of cake, she blushed and smiled, protesting slightly "John..." "Happy Birthday, Dana." Doggett smiled at her, very much amused by her blushing. "Make a wish." Everyone within earshot of the birthday song applauded, smiling at how sweet the couple looked, their smile widening at the prospect of Scully's belly. Doggett pulled up in front of Scully's apartment, turned off the ignition and came around to open Scully's door to walk her home. Scully inserted the key and opened her door, then turned to face him. "Thank you, John. I had a wonderful evening." That smile, Doggett doesn't think he can ever get used to that smile - or see it often enough. "Don't mention it." Doggett gazed into her eyes, looking for ... a sign. All of a sudden he doesn't want to wait for a sign anymore. Dipping his head, he kissed her, though chastely, on the lips. Scully looked surprised for a second, but pleased too. "Good night, John" "Good night, Dana" As Doggett bounced off the stairs down to his car, he felt like he was walking on clouds. The smile on his face has been there for so long that it's starting to hurt. He doesn't care. Wow. He kissed her. And she didn't kill him for it. This could be the start of something really good. That night, Doggett could hardly sleep, his brain is so wired from everything that's happened. When he did fall asleep though, his phone woke him. Groggily, he answered it. "Yeah." "It's Skinner. I want you to meet me at the Bureau in about 20 minutes." As Doggett quickly got dressed, he can't help but wondered. What did you wish for, Dana? <> Author's notes: Did you like it? I have a sequel in mind, but I'll just see how this one fares first, I guess. Feedback, PLEASE!!